It’s that time of year again, when the world is comes together to exchange gifts, spend time with family and have good will towards men! I’ve seen the Coca Cola advert and you know what that means, It’s Christmas! Yes, it’s coming again and while everyone is enjoying their mince pies, fruit cakes and Doctor Who Christmas Episode, I am remembering the things that terrified me about Christmas. Hey, don’t get me wrong, I like this holiday, getting gifts, Christmas cards, watching the Nativity and watching Doctor Who. I love that as much as the next girl but it’s the one time of the year, other than Halloween, that always scared me. It probably scares me even more than Halloween. These are, of course, childhood fears that have stayed with me through the years and while I am older and wiser, Christmas still creeps me out from time to time.
So for five days, this December, I will share my child hood fears of Christmas with you. You might think they are idiotic and stupid, I know I do, but it’s my gift to all of you. Now, Let’s start with that demon.
Didn’t you know there was a Christmas Demon?
Well, I had to grow up with it!
His name is Krampus and he is the scariest son of a duck on this Earth when you are 6 years old. I have no idea where my dad heard about Krampus because it was just recently, I found that that it’s everywhere in Europe and was not native to the US ( at least not until American Dad did an episode on it). Krampus, for those of you who don’t know, is a demon who comes after children who misbehave or are naughty throughout the year. Now, here’s the kicker. He puts them in his sack and takes them to his lair if they are really, really bad. This is how the tale goes, on December 5th or 6th, all children must clean their shoes, put them at the window along with a letter to St. Nicholas. In the morning, if they were good, they would get a gift from St. Nicholas but if they were bad, they would get gift from Krampus, a wooden stick. My dad’s version was I had to clean up my room, do my homework, get a good report card and be in bed on time throughout the year. If I was good, I would get a treat at Christmas but if I were bad, I would get a wooden stick and live with the fear that for the rest of December I would have to await a visit from Krampus. If he didn’t come, it would be that my dad made a bargain with him, or that he thought I wasn’t bad enough to take. That’s some really scary stuff for a 5/6 year old.
Now, in hindsight, this was obviously my dad doing all of these things, scaring me to make sure that I was good throughout the year, but the fear was still there. It made me scared of December 5th for a long, long time. Looking back, while it was mean, it was funny too. To be honest the whole Krampus idea worked, I got good grades, I was good, or at least as good as I could be. It was still mean though, and who ever told my father about that Alpine demon, Have A Scary Christmas and A Traumatic New Year!